Flash forward a few thousand years...

On a mission to fill his empty Friday afternoon, Christopher Ghorbani searches for a nearby impulse purchase (where's a PS2 when you need one?!). Upon finishing lunch at Chicago Place mall, we head down to The Science Store. Passing the huge display of 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' board games (yes, we're still in the science store), Chris comes across an ancient Aboriginal artifact, which oddly enough was made in China... The glorious Boomerang! Without a moment's hesitation, he grabs said toy--er...historic item and tosses it on the counter. And upon completing the following transaction, Ghobani is reunited with his ancient Aboriginal ancestry (okay, he's Iranian...close enough). A hop, skip and a jump later, the gang is at Briar Playground, 3200 N. Lake Shore Drive, ready to test out this ancient wonder. And so it begins...

Would you trust your boomerang to this man?!

4:17 - The first throw. Chris winds back, torques forward, releases, and......thunk! Chris has just planted a boomerang three inches into the grass.

"Okay, take the picture....now!"

4:18 - The second throw. Quite a difference from the first throw, the boomerang flies forward and makes a shallow bank left, climbs about 20 feet straight up, and plops back down to the grass. Needless to say, Chris is getting excited.

Chris: Excited

4:20 - The third throw. The wind up, and the pitch! A little bouncing action, the boomerang leaps off the grass and manages to make a semicircle about three feet above the grass before coming to a rest. Very impressive, I must say.

"Hmm...can I make it over Lake Shore Drive...?"

4:22 - The fourth throw. Changing technique, Ghorbani puts a little more gusto into this effort. The boomerang soars about 30 feet into the sky, and comes diving right back down...towards us! We all manage to barely escape the path of the vicious tool as it soars past our heads, and it clunks to a halt on the sidewalk.

We laugh in the face of dangerous, out-of-control boomerangs!!

4:23 - The final throw: Happy with his previous efforts, Chris flicks the boomerang into the sky. After making a quarter cirle, it gains altitude, stalls, and falls to the earth, straight toward the sidewalk. And as gloom falls upon Chris' face, and a scream escapes his lips, the life of the boomerang comes to an end as it shatters upon the sidewalk. (Editors Note: I'm surprised it lasted that long in the first place. I mean, this is Ghorbani we're talking about here.)

And so it ends...

Ghorbani falls to his knees with a cry of mourning as he hunches over his beloved tool. Despite several attempts to repair the item (where's the duct tape?!), the saga had come to an end. Note to self: "made in China" and balsam wood do not mix well. But you can bet I'll be all over Microsoft's latest release of Boomerang Simulator when it hits shelves this autumn!

- Wolfy